Finding calm in the chaos

Finding calm in the chaos

Saturday, May 11, 2013

farm wifery

For a long, long time, I have been resistant to the idea of becoming a farm wife. For you city slickers out there, farm wives work hard. They take care of their family, often by themselves. They help out on the farm. They drive truck during harvest...a skill I did manage to acquire when Joe and I were newlyweds. But, I didn't think I could ever be a farm wife. Before we had kids, I disliked the idea of coming home to an empty house while my husband worked late hours harvesting. After having kids, I couldn't stomach the idea of getting through dinner, baths, and bedtime as a solo parent. In short, I felt like if I ever became a farm wife, what little sanity I had would be slowly (or quickly) chipped away by all that time spent at home alone with my small children.

Joe has been pretty understanding about all of this throughout our marriage. We felt like our life was pretty full between our jobs, children, and the few hobbies we've managed to cling to despite parenthood. We are people who need our down time. Time to sit. Time to hang out with each other. Time to stare at the piles of laundry that need done. Time to dream about how nice it would be if we had a maid and a cook so we could have even more down time. Without down time, we get a little grouchy.

In my limited experience, farming is not a lifestyle compatible with a girl who needs her down time.

(Although, as I write this, I realized motherhood is not a lifestyle compatible with down time either).

But, as resistant as I've been to the whole farm-wifery idea, I can't ignore that farm kids are pretty awesome kids. Take my husband and his brothers: hard working, independent, good men. And these are qualities I want to instill in my own kids. So, when Joe had the opportunity to start doing a little farming with Steve, we decided we might give it a try.

For the most part, farm-wifery has been still an abstract idea. Joe and Steve have been working on paper work in setting up a partnership. All I've had to do is write a check to get things going....

...until today. Today, I became a real farm wife.

Joe and Steve had to plant corn all day.

Sam's birthday party was today.

And, I now have three small children to take care of.

When Joe told me this and said he'd be home in time for the party, I was, at first, grateful. Then, I realized that meant I'd be getting ready for the party all by myself. Well, not all by myself...I'd have the 3 kiddos with me, which was even worse. (You moms of little kids out there know what I mean...any task takes twice as long once a little person is involved and there is a high risk that the task will get undone and have to be redone once you do it). Totally overwhelmed.

I had myself a little pity party and then I put my big girl panties on.

And I got up at 6am today and frosted 50 cupcakes with 3 kids at home. Take that, farm-wifery! I'm gonna get 'er done and do it with some extra sprinkles. Go big or go home.

In all honesty, I talked a big game until about 11am when I called in Sasha for reinforcements.


Leah said...

Even big girls with their panties on need help :) Hope the party went well!!

Team Eddy said...

Aren't you glad it's only part-time farm wifery? It'll give you a chance to "ease" into it.